It's JUANuary ya'll!

Okay, it's that time again. 

Yes, I watch the Bachelor. I'm a 23 year old girl who spent the last four years of her life living in a sorority house, what do you expect? Although while some of my sistafriends watch with stars in their eyes and believe they are watching true love blossom right before their very eyes, I'm not that girl. I tend to be the one sharing the love seat in the corner with Anna, consuming one too many drinks, and cracking jokes and judging the crap out of everything that's happening on TV. 

This season we get to watch Juan Pablo on his search for the JUAN (seriously that play on words is never going to get old with me), and yesterday was the series premiere. I watched Juan Pablo on Desiree's season...and by "watched Juan Pablo" I mean my eyes were on the TV during what was probably four seconds total of his airtime. He was NEVER on TV with Des, and from what I could tell he barely had a relationship with her. It seemed a little bit to me like the producers almost planted him in the cast just to pull out the next bachelor. Whatever, after seeing his interviews with Chris Harrison and the promos and stuff he seems to be a pretty deece guy. He's from Venezuela? (idk. south american country.) So he's got the accent which his swoon-worthy. I also think it will be pretty interesting to watch him interact with a bunch of American women because English isn't his first language. So he doesn't know how to talk in circles and say things without really SAYING things like an American can do. So I feel like all of his interactions are going to be truly genuine because he communicates so directly. He won't be able to "accidentally fool" a girl into thinking he feels one way when he really doesn't.  Does that make sense? Plus he has a little daughter who is ADORABLE, so fine. I like Juan Pablo. 

The GIRLS this season? Oh my lanta. The first thing I said when I finished watching yesterday was "what a brilliant bunch of BS." The Bachelor producers never seem to fail to find some of the most bizarre, colorful, WEIRD AS SHIT women. I loved every second of watching these psychos get out of the limo and try to catch Juan Pablo's attention, all the while just becoming increasingly more and more intoxicated and more likely to start crying. It was deliciously entertaining. 

For list number 2 of my 52 Lists of 2014 I have composed a list of all of the girls and my reaction to them as they stepped out of the limo. I actually make this list every year in my phone so I can remember stupid stuff about them as the season goes on, but this year I guess I'll put it on here. So here's the link to Juan Pablo's 27 possible wives, as they first stepped out of the limo. 

I'll probably give an update with my thoughts every week about the Bachelor. I'll bet you anything next week is the date where they go bungee jumping or do some daring thing and the girl makes a comment about how "it's just like a metaphor for our relationship! A leap of faith!" Mark my words. So predicatble, but it's just SO ENTERTAINING.

Alexis
Ali
Amy J
Amy L
Andi
Ashley
Cassandra
Chantel
Chelsie
Christine
Christy
Clare
Danielle
Elise
Kat
Kelly
Kylie
Lacy
Lauren H
Lauren S.
Lucy
Maggie
Nikki
Renee
Sharleen
Valerie
Victoria

you guys are the only JUANS for me,