We've decided this is going to be a weekly column we write collaboratively. We're also going to include pop culture things we truly loved because you know, optimism. However, we acknowledge we are funnier when we're irritated...so here ya go.
POP CULTURE THAT PISSED US OFF
1. Danny and Mindy still aren't back together on The Mindy Project
DANNY TAKE YOUR OWN ADVICE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.
Danny is a person who, in an effort to not ruin a great thing, is ruining everything, including that great thing. We all know this person. I always love this person. But stop stomping on my bleeding television heart, Mindy Project writers. Let me marry Danny Castellano via Mindy, I beg of thee.
2. Amy Purdy's dress on Dancing With The Stars
Okay. Dancing with the Stars was Disney themed this week. (I will get into that in the "pleasing" category below, because obviously I loved that.) So as you can imagine, all of the pairs danced to songs from Disney movies dressed as Disney Characters
Let me preface this by telling you that for about four seasons now, it has been my dream to get famous and be on DWTS JUST SO I CAN DRESS UP AS CINDERELLA AND DANCE THE WALTZ. I'm not kidding you. I've been saying this since 2011. It's the only logical path right now to becoming Cinderella, which if you know me you know that's my constant hell-bent aspiration.
So I was pretty stoked when I found out that they were going to do a waltz as Cinderella and the Prince (I've already gotten past the envy thing. It's cool you guys). Except THEY PUT AMY PURDY IN A PINK PROM DRESS THAT LOOKED NOTHING LIKE CINDERELLA. WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY. Freakin' Danica McKellar was in an exact replica Belle dress and Charlie White and his partner Sharna Burgess looked EXACTLY like Mary Poppins and Bert. WHY COULD YOU NOT PICK OUT A BLUE DRESS FOR HER, COSTUME PEOPLE!? WHY. WHY WHY WHY. Like, I'm not trying to be dramatic but I'm not rooting for Amy anymore because her dress was pink (I was never even REALLY rooting for her, but it is AMAZING to watch her dance with prosthetic legs). Len called her "a vision." NO. SHE IS NOT A VISION. SHE IS AN INACCURATE REPRESENTATION. I'm mad. I will never get over this Amy Purdy. If you're gonna do it, do it right.
3. They did a Frozen number on Dancing With The Stars and I think it's a cop out
Peta and James did a contemporary dance to "Let it Go" from Frozen (Peta was the spitting image of Elsa so thanks for nothing DWTS costume department). I mean, James is smokin' hot and nobody seems to be able to shut the hell up about Frozen but I feel like this was kind of an unfair advantage. Like the number was great and everything (it scored all 10s) but I honestly think that James is going to get a large percentage of votes from people simply because everyone is obsessed with that song. He definitely DESERVES the votes, so I'd be way more pissed off about this if some idiot got to do Frozen and was going to get votes he/she didn't deserve, but still. Come on DWTS. They get "Let it Go" while Meryl Davis, who is the best one if you ask me, isn't even a Disney character she's just a concept representation of the Jungle Book. Seems unfair to me.
4. One Direction released their new music video
I could have watched these five idiots sit in a room doing nothing but singing this song and I would have been grateful and thrilled
(this is actually the Little Things video and it's great). Instead, I got a film 102 submission from an overly confident freshman who just learned a new trick on iMovie. No close up on Zayn's perfect high note, Niall's hair was a knife to the heart, needless and borderline uncomfortable animorphing that led to a bunch of unintended temporary mullets, and YEAH GUYS I GUESS I'M NOT OVER IT.
(you can read more about some of this here. Also probably stay tuned for some more in-depth ranting about this courtesy of Kathryn Hoven)
5. Miley Cyrus Cancelled her Kansas City concert
Maybe this is more of a "pop culture thing that pleased us," because I didn't end up buying a ticket.
+Taylor Renft really wanted me to go with her and I kept putting it off and putting it off and putting it off until we ended up deciding not to go. THANK GOD, because she cancelled 2 hours before her show due to "a bad allergic reaction to some antibiotics" ....................................................k. Then everybody was speculating and saying that it was because she took some bad drugs and she got all offended on twitter and told everyone to
"read the official statement" which she posted on her Twitter account. It was an iPhone note. Like, come on Miley. It's riddled with grammatical errors. THAT IS NOT OFFICIAL AT ALL. YOU WROTE THAT. You want us to know you didn't do bad drugs/weren't doing drugs when THIS was your Twitter photo? Get real. Start to be a better role model please. Lots of little girls look up to you.
6. Coachella is still happening.
Can you name five bands/acts you genuinely love and cannot possibly wait to see and belt along to your favorite songs? Enjoy Coachella. Are you there to dress half naked, celebrity stalk, and adopt Native American garb without any awareness or context on the cultural importance of such things, because you want to be trendy and cool like a former Disney star? Have a horrible Coachella.
7. "Free Spirit" Lucy Aragon posted this video
The fact that this even exists? I'm at a loss for words. Also you can't tell me April Fool's day is ACTUALLY your favorite holiday. I do not believe that. You're telling me you feel more joy and excitement on April Fool's Day than you do on Christmas? 4th of July? Thanksgiving? Your Birthday? Nope. Don't believe it.
POP CULTURE THAT PLEASED US
1. The Mindy Project
Basically just the fact that The Mindy Project exists is a Win for every week. Seriously it's our favorite show. I laugh out loud at it weekly, and also I'm in love with Peter Prentice, who is Adam Pally's character on the show. Mindy has great fashions and the writing is just so great. We want to be you Mindy, we want to be you.
2. It was Disney Week on Dancing With The Stars
You guys, it was amazing. I watched pretty much the entire show with a huge grin on my face. The opening number was a medley of Disney songs and it was just so happy. Charlie and Sharna were Mary Poppins and Bert and that was AMAZING, and Cheryl looked just like Jasmine! Disney is happy, always. I loved this. I wish they would do this every year.
3. SCANDAL FINALE
It was on. There were shockers. There were cliffhangers. WHY IS IT OVER NOW I NEED MORE! I won't write any more about this because I feel like I can't do so without spoiling things for you HEATHENS who haven't watched it yet. Can't wait for it to come back. Scandal, you kill me. (Not literally, but you do actually kill a lot of other people)
4. JOFFREY DIED ON GAME OF THRONES LAST WEEK
I DON'T LIKE TO GLORIFY DEATHS TYPICALLY, EVEN FICTIONAL BUT THIS WAS THE BEST DEATH EVER (I just sang that like Best Song Ever because that's how great this is). SO NECESSARY IN A WORLD WHERE VOLDEMORTS ARE SEEMINGLY ALWAYS THE VICTORS. Also immediately had a crush on Jack Gleeson? Weird.
5. This exists
Unsure if this was a "this week" thing but I just found it so it is for me. Deal with it.
