"Do not wait for extraordinary circumstances to do good; try to use ordinary situations."
The 50 States Ranked Based on How Willingly I'd Move There
Now that we've graduated and have moved out of Lawrence/home/to the places our new jobs are we spend a lot of time discussing the United States and places we'd like to live or could maybe call home someday. Also I've been slacking on my 52 lists, so I've compiled this one:
(No offense to anyone who lives in any of these states. Home is where you make it, and where your loved ones surround you.)
1. Kansas
I already live here, so it's my number one. I went to college here (ok fine, also high school and junior high), I know a lot of people who live here. Lawrence is the happiest place on earth. It's cheap. My family is here. No qualms with growing up with Kansas, so The Sunflower State gets #1.
2. New York
My "home state." I was born in New York. I lived for a while in New York. I am never not plotting my return to New York. Only reason it's not number 1 is because it's SO EXPENSIVE. It's a dream of mine to move to New York City for a while. Greatest city in the world.
3. Texas
I feel like everyone I know who has moved as of late has moved to Texas. It's warm there. There's Whataburger. I could dig it.
4. Georgia
BECAUSE THE SOUTH. Also Georgia just seems so charming. Also if I had children they could be on Stingrays.
5. South Carolina
Charleston. Mmmmmmmm.
6. North Carolina
The Outer Banks is there. Also I'm pretty sure I can get sweet tea at any restaurant I walk into there.
7. California
I think I would enjoy California, but like San Francisco. Not LA. Did you know San Francisco is in line with Kansas City? Like if you just walked in a straight line west from Kansas City you'd hit San Fran. If you went east you'd hit DC. I don't think I'd do well in LA, but I think it'd be fun to try to make it there. Overall I'm skeptical about California, but I think it'd be fun to give it a whirl.
8. Oklahoma
I don't know how this one got up this high, but it's warm a lot, a lot of the people I know from here are nice, and there's Cane's. I don't think this is an aspirational home as much as if someone told me "here's a great job, move to Oklahoma" I'd be cool with it. Also the sweet tea thing.
9. Tennessee
NASHVILLE. Also the sweet tea thing. Also if I moved here it would probably be because I got a job working for a cheerleading company and that would be BOMB.
10. Hawaii
Becuase duh who hasn’t daydreamed about living in Hawaii. It's not higher up becuase a. it’s not realistic and b. it’s very expensive.
11. Virginia
There’s a lot of cool history. Also it's on the east coast. That is my preferred coast.
12. Florida
I’ve always said Florida is a place for people from NJ who were too much of wussies to handle the weather. Too bad for me that describes myself. So yeah, I guess I was sort of made for Florida. Also I could go to Disney World whenever I wanted.
13. Pennsylvania
I’ve already lived here. It was nice. Philadelphia was alright. You can get great food, and there’s lots of cool history stuff.
14. New Jersey
Because if you had to live in a suburb and commute, wouldn’t you want that city to be NYC? Yeah. Jerz, I get it. I've lived here before and I like Kansas better, but New Jersey is alright. It’s a love/hate relationship, but it’s mostly love.
15. Connecticut
I can get a train to NYC from here.
16. Massachusetts
Because FINE BOSTON. I UNDERSTAND YOU’RE PRETTY. Also would rather be freezing on the east coast than freezing out in the middle of nowhere.
17. Rhode Island
Same east coast freezing rationale.
18. Kentucky
I think I’d do well in the south. Sweet tea. Would move to Kentucky just for the cheerleading.
19. Louisiana
This would’ve been much higher on the list had my brother not gotten shot here. Still a very nice place. COOL CULTURE. People would want to visit often. Also Bey and Jay's tour went to New Orleans and didn't come to Kansas City so...
20. Delaware
Train ride to NYC.
21. Illinois
Because living in Chicago wouldn’t be the END OF THE WORLD, but it’s not NYC. Never will be NYC. CHICAGO STOP TRYING TO BE NYC. Also it snows here like, always. I couldn't do it.
22. Missouri
Would be lower on the list, but the reality of it is I’ll probably end up living in Missouri to be closer to work. Womp womp. REFUSE to get a Missouri driver’s license tho. REFUSE. Do not let this moderately high ranking lead you to believe that Missouri is NOT the butthole of America, becasue it is.
23. Alabama
I don't know. Middle of the list. More of a “there are a lot of places that could be worse” thing. Also sweet tea.
24. Mississippi
See Alabama description.
25. Arizona
See Mississippi description. Also I would probably fare well here because zero humidity and warmth.
26. Maryland
Baltimore seems dangerous (Ray Rice) but I would be close to family. Also the Baltimore Aquarium is COOL.
27. Oregon
Only ranked this high as long as Megan Lewis is there. Drops significantly once she moves out.
28. Arkansas
See Alabama description.
29. Minnesota
If I HAD to move somewhere that’s THIS COLD, at least this is a big city. Plus Mall of America is in Minnesota.
30. Maine
I don’t think I’d like it here, but I'm unsure.
31. Nevada
At least it's dry and warm. I feel like I would feel eternally hungover in Nevada just from breathing the same air as people in Vegas do.
32. West Virginia
At least I’d still be in the Big 12? I don't think I'd like it here.
33. Nebraska
Only reason it’s this high is because it’s a short drive home to KC.
34. Wisconsin
It’s freezing. I would hate it here. But Go Pack.
35. Utah
Snows too much. But wouldn’t mind if I could live with Aunt Patty and Uncle Richie.
36. Michigan
DETROIT? Nope.
37. Vermont
sNOw
38. New Hampshire
see Vermont description.
39. Washington
I know nobody and nothing about this place.
40. Indiana
BORING
41. Wyoming
EVEN MORE BORING
42. Idaho
EVEN MORE BORING
43. New Mexico
EVEN MORE BORING
44. Montana
EVEN MORE BORING (I was able to list 49 of the 50 states from memory. Like that episode of Friends. Montana was the one I forgot)
45. South Dakota
EVEN MORE BORING (AND COLD)
46. North Dakota
EVEN MORE BORING (AND COLDER)
47. Iowa
Freezing, not even beautiful like some of the cold western states.
48. Alaska
Far away from the fam, and it’s one of those places where you run into that issue where you only get so much sunlight a day? No thanks. Also snow. That's a given.
49. Colorado
Because the “we’re so cool bc we can smoke weed” thing is the most annoying thing in the world. WE GET IT. ITS NOT THAT COOL. Also it snows there. A lot.
50. Ohio
Worst state in the nation. Bye.
365 Lovely Thoughts: #266
"In your soul are infinitely precious things that cannot be taken from you."
-Oscar Wilde
Jimmy v. Blake Shelton v. Gwen Stefani
There's no way I wasn't going to share this. I'm literally crying I'm laughing so hard. This rocks. I love you, Jimmy Fallon.
365 Lovely Thoughts: #257
"Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint you can on it."
-Danny Kaye
Today.
Today is a hard day. I know it's been a while since I've been around, and this is a dark way to return to the sparkly hallowed halls of of Get a Klew, but to not write today wouldn't be right.
I should preface by saying I'm from north Jersey. We could see the smoke from the higher hills in my area. Plenty of our parents then, and us now, worked in the city. It's only forty miles away. I didn't know what a World Trade Center was when I was ten. I just knew the Twin Towers we always spotted on the skyline. The ones we took photos in front of on the ferry. I was in 5th grade. My mother picked us up almost immediately. We had lived in Singapore for a while a few years before, and she knew what the outside world thought of America. She did not think it was over.
The day has always stuck with me. There were a few from my community we lost entirely, more who lost jobs and livelihoods in the fallout. There were none of us entirely unscathed.
I ended up writing my English thesis in college on children in 9/11 literature, inspired jointly by Jonathan Safran Foer's Extrememly Loud & Incredibly Close which had been recommended to me by my senior year English teacher in high school, and my mother's own method of reaching out to me in the aftermath of that day. Naturally, she bought me a book. Joyce Maynard's The Usual Rules was about a thirteen year old girl who lost her mother September 11th. My mother and I never talked about that day, we just went to the church services and memorials, we cooked for grieving families, and she spoke to me through a book. That was enough. There weren't words for it then, anyway.
Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close reopened and salved old hurts seven years later, and has not left me. My copy is underlined and written in and beloved. The story weaves the thoughts of nine-year-old Oskar Schell, who lost his father that morning, with narratives from his grandparents who survived the Dresden bombings of World War II. When I first read the novel, this section from Oskar seemed to capture how it felt to be a kid, swallowing that day.
I should preface by saying I'm from north Jersey. We could see the smoke from the higher hills in my area. Plenty of our parents then, and us now, worked in the city. It's only forty miles away. I didn't know what a World Trade Center was when I was ten. I just knew the Twin Towers we always spotted on the skyline. The ones we took photos in front of on the ferry. I was in 5th grade. My mother picked us up almost immediately. We had lived in Singapore for a while a few years before, and she knew what the outside world thought of America. She did not think it was over.
The day has always stuck with me. There were a few from my community we lost entirely, more who lost jobs and livelihoods in the fallout. There were none of us entirely unscathed.
I ended up writing my English thesis in college on children in 9/11 literature, inspired jointly by Jonathan Safran Foer's Extrememly Loud & Incredibly Close which had been recommended to me by my senior year English teacher in high school, and my mother's own method of reaching out to me in the aftermath of that day. Naturally, she bought me a book. Joyce Maynard's The Usual Rules was about a thirteen year old girl who lost her mother September 11th. My mother and I never talked about that day, we just went to the church services and memorials, we cooked for grieving families, and she spoke to me through a book. That was enough. There weren't words for it then, anyway.
Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close reopened and salved old hurts seven years later, and has not left me. My copy is underlined and written in and beloved. The story weaves the thoughts of nine-year-old Oskar Schell, who lost his father that morning, with narratives from his grandparents who survived the Dresden bombings of World War II. When I first read the novel, this section from Oskar seemed to capture how it felt to be a kid, swallowing that day.
We need much bigger pockets, I thought as I lay in bed, counting off the seven minutes that it takes a normal person to fall asleep. We need enormous pockets, pockets big enough for our families, and our friends, and even the people who aren't on our lists, people we've never met but still want to protect. We need pockets for boroughs and for cities, a pocket that could hold the universe.
Now, thirteen years later, with the world still not snuggled safely in a pocket, scary as ever, I think of this later passage from Oskar's grandmother remembering her sister, lost in Dresden, and it's the lesson I still try to learn from this day and all the others.
I had never told her how much I loved her.
She was my sister.
We slept in the same bed.
There was never a right time to say it.
It was always unnecessary.
The books in my father's shed were sighing.
The sheets were rising and falling around me with Anna's breathing.
I thought about waking her.
But it was unnecessary.
There would be other nights.
And how can you say I love you to someone you love?
I rolled onto my side and fell asleep next to her.
Here is the point of everything I have been trying to tell you, Oskar.
It's always necessary.
I love you.
Whether you're reading this or not, or if we've met or not, today or any other, know I'd put you in my pocket, and I love you too. It's the best we can do.
klew's state of the union
Well, it's been a while.
I was thinking about sitting down to write a post and I realized that I don't really have anything huge to say that could take up a whole post, but I do have a bunch of little things. So comes the birth of "Klew's State of the Union," just a bunch of things floating around in my head as of late.
I think that's all for now.
I was thinking about sitting down to write a post and I realized that I don't really have anything huge to say that could take up a whole post, but I do have a bunch of little things. So comes the birth of "Klew's State of the Union," just a bunch of things floating around in my head as of late.
- The biggest thing in my life right now is this chapstick I'm trying to finish. Like I'm almost all the way through an entire chapstick. It's actually really hard to finish an entire chapstick. They get lost so easily. I've misplaced this one like 5 times but it keeps popping back up. Stay tuned.
- On a similar note, why do they make the shampoo bottle and the conditioner bottle the same size? I always run out of shampoo way before I run out of conditioner. So then I go buy a new shampoo and run out of conditioner while I'm like, full of shampoo. Its a vicious cycle. It's like the hot dogs and hot dog rolls thing.
- Keke Palmer debuted as Cinderella on Broadway last night. I saw a clip of her. She's really good. I'm fine with it. I was mad about it at first because I didn't know if she was going to have the talent to do the singing justice, but she totally does. Good for her. Plus I watched her do an interview and she's all about empowering girls to accomplish their dreams. Rock on Keke.
- On a similar note, CINDERELLA IS CLOSING ON JANUARY 3. I am devastated. Do we really want to live in a world where Cinderella is not dancing with the prince every day? Is that something we're ready to commit to? Nope. No.
- I recently started a new job! It is great. I enjoy it. I do not enjoy the commute, however. This is just further motivation to get my shit together so I can move closer to Kansas City.
- I have learned my lesson that if you are unhappy, make a change. Thx Cinderella. Thx family and friends. Thx other fairytales. Your lesson got through to me.
- The Bachelor in Paradise finale was lame. I wanted to watch somebody get arrested or something.
- I got my own Fantasy Football team. My family made a league and didn't invite me to play more or less because I was a girl (they didn't ask me because they didn't think I would be interested). I put up this huge stink about being a victim of gender profiling (I was kidding of course), but my uncle decided he didn't have enough time to manage his team so I took over. My team name is "Klew be Bossin it" (thanks to Chris Moffo), and my avatar is Kristin Wiig as Cinderella drinking a martini and saying "whatever." I think it's a pretty accurate representation of how I feel about playing Fantasy Football.
- I lost my first week by two points. Also I had Ray Rice on my team. I released him. Punching your wife in the face may result in a two game suspension from the league but it results in lifetime suspension from Klew Be Bossin It. Sorry. Team policy.
- I really want to get some cool red pants for KC Cheer competitions.
- Fame just got all of their choreography. It's really cute. I'm really excited to get this season started.
- I want to open my own Etsy shop. Looking into that later.
I think that's all for now.
365 Lovely Thoughts: #253
"Sing your song, dream your dream, hope your hope and pray your prayer."
-Pakenham Beatty
365 Lovely Thoughts: #249
"Cherish forever what makes you unique, 'cuz you're really a yawn if it goes."
-Bette Midler
365 Lovely Thoughts: #244
"Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible!'"
